funny baby
EMBALMING IS AN ENVIRONMENTAL PROBLEM
People! Listen to me! Embalming is an environmental problem! Nobody wants to think about what happens to our bodies after death. I really get that. But if you really want to get creeped out, think about those harmful chemicals leaching into your water. That's right, dear friends...if you want to gag, read the article "Drinking Grandma and yes, the facts in the article are exactly as disgusting as you might imagine.
I'm on this rant because I went with a friend today to make arrangements for her grandmother today and that poor funeral director probably is praying right now that I won't be at the funeral for fear that I'll get up on my soap box against embalming. He tried to impress me (read: shut me up) by telling me that embalming fluids of today are a big improvement over the old arsenic based embalming fluids that were used until the early 1900s when they were eliminated not only because of harmful health effects (Knoefes & McGee, 2002) but because of their interference in investigations of cases where arsenic poisoning was suspected (Iserson, 1994). We probably overcame all the benefits of that decision by turning to the use of treated wood but that's another issue.
Just to prove that ALL embalming is an environmental problem, studies performed in
New York and Iowa found elevated levels of arsenic in the groundwater "downstream" of late-19th-century cemeteries. These same studies indicated that there were elevated levels of copper, zinc, and lead elements associated with the materials used to make caskets back in the day (Knoefes & McGee, 2002).
Despite these well-documented findings, embalming just to have delayed and open-casket funerals continues to be commonplace in America. The rather poor excuse that the funeral director (that I was browbeating according to my friend) cited for this practice is that in this day of longevity people don't come in contact with death in the same way as in the pre-embalming days when the women of the house were responsible for "laying out" the deceased and people would rather that our dead loved ones be more attractive so that our last memories of them would not be tainted with the harsh realities of death. To that, I say HOGWASH!
If you want to talk harsh realities, talk about embalming fluids in your drinking water and then get back to me on wanting people to look good after they pass on to the great beyond.
WHAT'S IN EMBALMING FLUID
Embalming is an environmental problem because the primary ingredient in most modern embalming fluids is formaldehyde and findings suggest that formaldehyde is harmful to public health and probably not a good thing to be pouring into our environment. Here's some math on how much of this toxic stuff we are dosing the earth with.
The average adult embalming requires roughly 3.5 gallons (Cook, 1999) and estimates from the National Funeral Director's Association are that two million Americans are embalmed each year. Ok, boys and girls that adds up to roughly seven million gallons of formaldehyde being deliberately placed in the soil each year.
Oh, and that's not the end of it; there are at least 42 other federally regulated "dangerous chemicals that are commonly used in embalming and body preparation (Iserson, 1994 all of which end up in the ground or being burned in a crematorium. AND, nobody knows how long it takes for formaldehyde to degrade or what damage it does in the meantime (Cook, 1999).
Now, you tell me if embalming is an environment problem or not.
I'm on this rant because I went with a friend today to make arrangements for her grandmother today and that poor funeral director probably is praying right now that I won't be at the funeral for fear that I'll get up on my soap box against embalming. He tried to impress me (read: shut me up) by telling me that embalming fluids of today are a big improvement over the old arsenic based embalming fluids that were used until the early 1900s when they were eliminated not only because of harmful health effects (Knoefes & McGee, 2002) but because of their interference in investigations of cases where arsenic poisoning was suspected (Iserson, 1994). We probably overcame all the benefits of that decision by turning to the use of treated wood but that's another issue.
Just to prove that ALL embalming is an environmental problem, studies performed in
New York and Iowa found elevated levels of arsenic in the groundwater "downstream" of late-19th-century cemeteries. These same studies indicated that there were elevated levels of copper, zinc, and lead elements associated with the materials used to make caskets back in the day (Knoefes & McGee, 2002).
Despite these well-documented findings, embalming just to have delayed and open-casket funerals continues to be commonplace in America. The rather poor excuse that the funeral director (that I was browbeating according to my friend) cited for this practice is that in this day of longevity people don't come in contact with death in the same way as in the pre-embalming days when the women of the house were responsible for "laying out" the deceased and people would rather that our dead loved ones be more attractive so that our last memories of them would not be tainted with the harsh realities of death. To that, I say HOGWASH!
If you want to talk harsh realities, talk about embalming fluids in your drinking water and then get back to me on wanting people to look good after they pass on to the great beyond.
WHAT'S IN EMBALMING FLUID
Embalming is an environmental problem because the primary ingredient in most modern embalming fluids is formaldehyde and findings suggest that formaldehyde is harmful to public health and probably not a good thing to be pouring into our environment. Here's some math on how much of this toxic stuff we are dosing the earth with.
The average adult embalming requires roughly 3.5 gallons (Cook, 1999) and estimates from the National Funeral Director's Association are that two million Americans are embalmed each year. Ok, boys and girls that adds up to roughly seven million gallons of formaldehyde being deliberately placed in the soil each year.
Oh, and that's not the end of it; there are at least 42 other federally regulated "dangerous chemicals that are commonly used in embalming and body preparation (Iserson, 1994 all of which end up in the ground or being burned in a crematorium. AND, nobody knows how long it takes for formaldehyde to degrade or what damage it does in the meantime (Cook, 1999).
Now, you tell me if embalming is an environment problem or not.
IS HAVING KIDS SELFISH?
I'll be the first one to say that it's hard to be selfish with a houseful of kids. But..is having kids selfish when considering the "human impact" of climate change? There are those who think that each family should have no more than one child because having children is an environmental problem.
John Guillebaud of the Optimum Population Trust based in London has indicated that he believes that parents that are having lots of kids are guilty of committing "eco-crimes" and is quoted as saying something to the effect that having one less child far exceeds any benefits gained from repeatedly turning off electric lights and other such energy saving efforts. Apparently each baby that is born is the equivalent of one airline flight after the other criss-crossing the planet. This made me wonder who did this reseach and came up with this rather vague comparison but I got the point.
Even Planned Parenthood appears to be on board and is plastering signs all over the place with the message, "The fewer the merrier."
As for me, I'm in the boat with Al Gore who also has three kids over the recommended number. He's taking a little bit of heat from the press who is accusing him of not practicing what he preaches and sending the message: Do as I say, not as I breed.
In his and Tipper's defense, they had their family long before global warming became an issue. But now that whopping, huge house they had....well, if I ever see him in person I will be asking him about that before I ask him whether or not it is selfish to have children. So, what do you think? Is having kids selfish? Does having more than one child make those of us who talk about living green hypocrites?
John Guillebaud of the Optimum Population Trust based in London has indicated that he believes that parents that are having lots of kids are guilty of committing "eco-crimes" and is quoted as saying something to the effect that having one less child far exceeds any benefits gained from repeatedly turning off electric lights and other such energy saving efforts. Apparently each baby that is born is the equivalent of one airline flight after the other criss-crossing the planet. This made me wonder who did this reseach and came up with this rather vague comparison but I got the point.
Even Planned Parenthood appears to be on board and is plastering signs all over the place with the message, "The fewer the merrier."
As for me, I'm in the boat with Al Gore who also has three kids over the recommended number. He's taking a little bit of heat from the press who is accusing him of not practicing what he preaches and sending the message: Do as I say, not as I breed.
In his and Tipper's defense, they had their family long before global warming became an issue. But now that whopping, huge house they had....well, if I ever see him in person I will be asking him about that before I ask him whether or not it is selfish to have children. So, what do you think? Is having kids selfish? Does having more than one child make those of us who talk about living green hypocrites?
IS GREEN PARENTING OBSESSIVE PARENTING
Is green parenting obsessive parenting in disguise? I hardly think so but there must be a virus of hate going around, because I've gotten some really snarky comments on a few of my posts that I made awhile back that indicated that I was being over protective and was obsessed with my daughter's illnesses and allergies. WTH?
I've heard instances where parents were attacked and criticized about the choices they made regarding breastfeeding in public, vaccinations, green living practices and yeah...even recycling! One has to believe that education is the answer to such biased thinking and ignorance but yet here we are in 2010 and getting bashed for believing the data that proves beyond a doubt that global warming is real, reports that there are islands of garbage floating in the ocean that exceed the size of some states and that the effects of the major environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico will take decades to overcome.
How anyone can find the time to bash the gay community and harass parents over trying to make a better world for their kids is mind boggling since there are so many bigger issues to get huffy about. Maybe haters are looking for easy targets and the big corporations are out of reach?
For the record:
I have had to wrestle with whether or not to vaccinate my daughters because, autism aside, they have severe egg allergies..so shoot me.
My husband and I co-sleep with our babies. Yes, it's hard to know when and how to stop co-sleeping but I wouldn't trade those nights snuggled with my infants in my arms knowing that they were safe and well for anything.
I breastfed each of my girls as long as I possibly could but there were times when I supplemented with store bought formula when I had to. It hurt at the time, but a mom does what she has to do.
I believe that organic foods are better for all of us and don't like plastic coming in contact with my food but when push came to shove I have been known to pop a frozen dinner in the microwave.
I have used both cloth and disposable diapers. I prefer organic cotton cloth diapering but there have been times when it was just easier to use disposables and I succumbed to temptation.
Do my choices make it sound like I'm an obsessed parent? When is green parenting obsessive parenting? When there is no flexibility and you sacrifice the peace and functionality of the family for the sake of sticking to a cause at all costs. That ain't me.
I've heard instances where parents were attacked and criticized about the choices they made regarding breastfeeding in public, vaccinations, green living practices and yeah...even recycling! One has to believe that education is the answer to such biased thinking and ignorance but yet here we are in 2010 and getting bashed for believing the data that proves beyond a doubt that global warming is real, reports that there are islands of garbage floating in the ocean that exceed the size of some states and that the effects of the major environmental disaster in the Gulf of Mexico will take decades to overcome.
How anyone can find the time to bash the gay community and harass parents over trying to make a better world for their kids is mind boggling since there are so many bigger issues to get huffy about. Maybe haters are looking for easy targets and the big corporations are out of reach?
For the record:
I have had to wrestle with whether or not to vaccinate my daughters because, autism aside, they have severe egg allergies..so shoot me.
My husband and I co-sleep with our babies. Yes, it's hard to know when and how to stop co-sleeping but I wouldn't trade those nights snuggled with my infants in my arms knowing that they were safe and well for anything.
I breastfed each of my girls as long as I possibly could but there were times when I supplemented with store bought formula when I had to. It hurt at the time, but a mom does what she has to do.
I believe that organic foods are better for all of us and don't like plastic coming in contact with my food but when push came to shove I have been known to pop a frozen dinner in the microwave.
I have used both cloth and disposable diapers. I prefer organic cotton cloth diapering but there have been times when it was just easier to use disposables and I succumbed to temptation.
Do my choices make it sound like I'm an obsessed parent? When is green parenting obsessive parenting? When there is no flexibility and you sacrifice the peace and functionality of the family for the sake of sticking to a cause at all costs. That ain't me.
Baby Smile | Smile baby has meaning
However, if you observe, the smile of a baby actually contains a variety of meanings. Her smile is not just the sign that she was glad to see mother or father, but also more than just communicating meaning. Smiling babies also showed a brain development.
From birth, infants are able to show his grin, but smile is often just a quick and spontaneous nature. Grin was triggered by the inflammatory neurons in the brain stem, but not influenced by a good mood. There are times when your baby is asleep, a smile will come out by itself. Some scientists estimate the smile is caused by motor cells near the brain where the REM (rapid eye movement, in which the brain to process data and memory so that the baby often dreaming or delirious) originated.
Communication between parents and children do not only occur in one direction, when a parent caring for a baby, but also when there is a two-way interaction. That's what happens when the child began to show a genuine smile. There was a attachment (bonding) between you and your baby.
However, psychologists also predicted, the babies are bigger still often show his false smile on the parents. Foreigners, especially, just goto this fake smile. So if you're teasing your friend's baby, and she smiled, not ge-er first. Maybe he was just making small talk at you.
Source : ozzyatyogya.wordpress.com/
CARDBOARD BABY HIGH CHAIRS
I'm really excited about finding and buying a couple of the cardboard baby high chairs I've been reading about! Nope, I'm not trying to sell the things and NOPE again, the cardboard cribs that were all the rage about a year ago didn't strike me as something to get all up in the air about. In fact, (other than they were made from recycled cardboard which is a better option than buying NEW nursery furniture for sure) they left me yawning because HO HUM we co-sleep with our babies.
But now, I can get behind reusable, portable baby high chair big time! I'll tell you a little bit about one that I'm thinking of buying in a minute. First, I want to tell you why a high chair made of cardboard is blowing my hair back much more than a cardboard crib other than the reason I listed earlier...oh, and no this is NOT a review in case the FTC wants to know. I've never used either product and would, in fact, like to hear from any of you who have opinions on the Belkiz Feedaway if you have experience or alternatives if you know of one that is better or cheap.
How many of you have taken your babies out to eat and ask for a high chair only to have a nasty, sticky wooden baby high chair delivered to your table? Not to mention that the safety harness was either missing, damaged or tied in knots? Well, this has happened to me often enough that I'm considering carrying my own high chairs (I have more than one baby) when we go out.
What do you think about this plan? Is it worth it to carry our own cardboard baby high chairs with us when we go out to eat to avoid using those less than clean ones in the restaurant? Or would you just rather stay home, use your own high chair and eat a hot dog because flat pack or not...it's just too much trouble?
I'm all for going green, baby, but there are times when doing without an item completely is preferable to dealing with the hassle if you know what I mean.
But now, I can get behind reusable, portable baby high chair big time! I'll tell you a little bit about one that I'm thinking of buying in a minute. First, I want to tell you why a high chair made of cardboard is blowing my hair back much more than a cardboard crib other than the reason I listed earlier...oh, and no this is NOT a review in case the FTC wants to know. I've never used either product and would, in fact, like to hear from any of you who have opinions on the Belkiz Feedaway if you have experience or alternatives if you know of one that is better or cheap.
How many of you have taken your babies out to eat and ask for a high chair only to have a nasty, sticky wooden baby high chair delivered to your table? Not to mention that the safety harness was either missing, damaged or tied in knots? Well, this has happened to me often enough that I'm considering carrying my own high chairs (I have more than one baby) when we go out.
What do you think about this plan? Is it worth it to carry our own cardboard baby high chairs with us when we go out to eat to avoid using those less than clean ones in the restaurant? Or would you just rather stay home, use your own high chair and eat a hot dog because flat pack or not...it's just too much trouble?
I'm all for going green, baby, but there are times when doing without an item completely is preferable to dealing with the hassle if you know what I mean.
ARE GHOSTS REAL or NOT?
Are ghosts real or not? Spooks and hauntings are a very popular subject in the South where I live. It seems that everybody I know has a favorite ghost story that they love to tell that will literally make the hair stand up on the back of your neck. Listening to these ghost stories is particularly horrifying because this isn't one of those ghost hunters on television that's paid to dig up stories; these tales are being told by people that were raised to tell the truth just like you and me not dumb, toothless rednecks that believe they saw Sasquatch the last time they had too much to drink.
CREDIBILITY
When you are sitting on the porch in the gloaming of a crisp fall evening listening to somebody you've know all your life tell a story with their grandmother by their side corroborating the details, let me tell you that it’s easy to accept that ghosts are real...very real! To tell the truth, I have even had two or three experiences that were rather shocking. I can’t say that a spirit was responsible for the inexplicable events. But since the occurrences took place in a house where there had been several suicides and tragic deaths I just had to wonder why had never experienced anything like it anywhere else. These were not willo-the-wisps that I ran up on and if only I had had a camera! No, I was not drinking and I have conscientiously refrained from saying that the house was haunted for fear of being labeled as a kook!
SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATIONS
How do I know that what I saw (and heard) were not natural like will-o'-the-wisps? Because I am very familiar with those spooky little flares of light that will make you want to run and stick your head under the covers even though you are well aware that they are a natural phenomenon. My granddaddy's farm had a swampy area just south of the barn and many nights when we were late milking the cows I had more than a few sightings of will-o-the-wisps on winter nights that were blacker than a city dweller can even imagine.
The nights in this part of the country are so black that you can stand with your eyes open and imagine that what you are feeling is what it’s like to be blind and when you see the flickering lights produced by decaying organic matter bouncing in and out between the cypress trees, you don’t forget what it looks like. Even when you know what they are, when the adult standing there with you says something to the tune of, "There goes the "corpse candles"." Who could blame a little girl for being scared out of her wits; scientific explanations be hanged!
For what it’s worth, they look nothing like bouncing orbs that are said to be lingering spirits that are filmed by ghost hunters on television.
So, I look forward to hearing your opinions...are ghosts real or not? Do you have a good ghost story to tell? I do, but you are going to have to wait until later to hear it. Right now, my girls' lunch takes priority over ghost stories.
CREDIBILITY
When you are sitting on the porch in the gloaming of a crisp fall evening listening to somebody you've know all your life tell a story with their grandmother by their side corroborating the details, let me tell you that it’s easy to accept that ghosts are real...very real! To tell the truth, I have even had two or three experiences that were rather shocking. I can’t say that a spirit was responsible for the inexplicable events. But since the occurrences took place in a house where there had been several suicides and tragic deaths I just had to wonder why had never experienced anything like it anywhere else. These were not willo-the-wisps that I ran up on and if only I had had a camera! No, I was not drinking and I have conscientiously refrained from saying that the house was haunted for fear of being labeled as a kook!
SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATIONS
How do I know that what I saw (and heard) were not natural like will-o'-the-wisps? Because I am very familiar with those spooky little flares of light that will make you want to run and stick your head under the covers even though you are well aware that they are a natural phenomenon. My granddaddy's farm had a swampy area just south of the barn and many nights when we were late milking the cows I had more than a few sightings of will-o-the-wisps on winter nights that were blacker than a city dweller can even imagine.
The nights in this part of the country are so black that you can stand with your eyes open and imagine that what you are feeling is what it’s like to be blind and when you see the flickering lights produced by decaying organic matter bouncing in and out between the cypress trees, you don’t forget what it looks like. Even when you know what they are, when the adult standing there with you says something to the tune of, "There goes the "corpse candles"." Who could blame a little girl for being scared out of her wits; scientific explanations be hanged!
For what it’s worth, they look nothing like bouncing orbs that are said to be lingering spirits that are filmed by ghost hunters on television.
So, I look forward to hearing your opinions...are ghosts real or not? Do you have a good ghost story to tell? I do, but you are going to have to wait until later to hear it. Right now, my girls' lunch takes priority over ghost stories.
GREEN HOME CLEANING SOLUTIONS
Any list offering tips for green home cleaning solutions should involve more than recipes for green household cleaners. Not that chemical free toilet cleaners are not a step in the right direction but those of you still using paper products should be aware that paper products (paper towels, facial tissues, etc) made up 20.7 % of the municipal waste discarded in 2008. Yep, that year it was reported that there was 6,550,000 tons of paper and paperboard waste.
I got curious as to how much my own home was contributing to this problem so I decided to conduct an experiment (being as experiments are so cool and I needed something to write about in the worst way). What I did was direct hubby and the older girls to throw every facial tissue and paper towel into a special trash bin. They were so enthusiastic about being asked to participate that they actually asked if there was going to be a waste can next to the toilet! I thought about it and had to admit that collecting toilet paper would have given more accurate results but dismissed the thought as a little too gross.
Before the day was out my trash can was overflowing with wet wipes and tissues used to wipe runny noses much less paper towels that I used to clean the glass, kitchen and bathroom surfaces!
Wow, this really made me aware that I needed to bone up on my all around green home cleaning solutions and not just how to clean a toilet without toxic chemicals and this is the plan that I came up with.
The results that I expect to see should come in the way of less money spent on disposables and a much emptier can on trash pickup day.
The unexpected amount of paper that I collected in such a short time was a reminder that even though I've made great strides toward making a green home for my family, there is much work to be done and that going green is an ongoing process.
I got curious as to how much my own home was contributing to this problem so I decided to conduct an experiment (being as experiments are so cool and I needed something to write about in the worst way). What I did was direct hubby and the older girls to throw every facial tissue and paper towel into a special trash bin. They were so enthusiastic about being asked to participate that they actually asked if there was going to be a waste can next to the toilet! I thought about it and had to admit that collecting toilet paper would have given more accurate results but dismissed the thought as a little too gross.
Before the day was out my trash can was overflowing with wet wipes and tissues used to wipe runny noses much less paper towels that I used to clean the glass, kitchen and bathroom surfaces!
Wow, this really made me aware that I needed to bone up on my all around green home cleaning solutions and not just how to clean a toilet without toxic chemicals and this is the plan that I came up with.
- toss the mop that has disposable mop heads and shop for one with a washable cover
- stop using paper towels and invest in low lint microfiber cleaning cloths
- stop using disposable scrub pads and buy scrubbing stones (that would probably be the only thing that will tackle those pesky toilet bowl rings anyway)
The results that I expect to see should come in the way of less money spent on disposables and a much emptier can on trash pickup day.
The unexpected amount of paper that I collected in such a short time was a reminder that even though I've made great strides toward making a green home for my family, there is much work to be done and that going green is an ongoing process.
'Cause I've gotta have Faith? Or according to Glee, a gruyere on whole wheat.
*Spoilers ahead. If you watch Glee and haven't seen this week's episode yet, you may want to save this post for a later date.*
My husband and I don't go to church. My children have only been in a church for Christmas service and the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit are not usually invited into our home. Jesus is a name we invoke only in fits of pique and other than the occasional blaspheme my children have little knowledge of the presence of Jesus Christ or God (dammit).
Mr. C was raised Congregationalist, went on retreats, sang in the choir, and participated in youth programs led by his parents who were youth leaders. I was raised Catholic, we were Saturday afternoon Catholics to be specific, and while I also spent many, many hours in the church, even attending a Catholic elementary school and singing in the chorus myself, I have my own reasons why I don't support or follow the teachings of the Catholic church any longer. Good reasons, I might add, but that's between me and God for the time being.
Yes, I believe in God or I try to anyway. To this day, I still want to believe in the existence of a higher power. But I struggle with His (or lower case, his) existence.
The fact that we haven't thrown our hat into the church-going ring, that we haven't adopted a local church of our own, that we haven't exposed our children to the teachings of the apostles and the New Testament, is a thorn in my Mother in Law's side and if my mother and grandmother were still alive, I have no doubt it would bother them too. Mr. C's mom is a spiritual woman who thinks that families are stronger for having a church to grow up in and around and my mother and Gram, God rest their sainted souls, held steadfast in their belief that the Catholic church, though hypocritical it may be, was the way to go.
I cannot, in good faith, hang my hat on either of those beliefs.
Last night I sat down to watch my favorite show, Glee, and Glee did something it rarely does - it disappointed me. I spent the entire hour watching the show horror movie-style: With my hands over my eyes, splayed fingers allowing only glimpses of the train wreck to get through, such was my fear that the writers of the show would "go there". They did. Well, almost.
Glee Tackles Religion is not something I thought I would ever see. Glee tackles Prince, yes. Glee tackles the musical stylings of Burt Bacharach, most definitely. Glee takes on the existence of God and the importance of allowing Him into your heart? *sigh*
The gist of the show was this: Finn gets hungry and makes himself a snack and upon inspecting the toasted cheese sandwich he cooked on the George Foreman, he sees the face of Jesus. The Grilled Cheesus. Praise gouda.
Finn decides that it's a sign and begins to pray to it for typical teen things - Please let him get his position as quarterback back, Please let him feel up his girlfriend. Spiritual things like that. Then Kurt's dad has a heart attack and ends up in a coma. This is when the host really hits the fan.
You see, almost everyone in the Glee club believes that God is good, God is great, God gives us chocolate cake. Not only that, but everyone needs a little God in their heart to get through life's trials. Everyone, that is, except Sue (more on her later) and Kurt who, bless his atheistic heart, believes in the Flying Spaghetti Monster and deems a morning at Mercedes' church is worthy only because he can wear a fabulous hat. "Very Christ chic," he says when appraising the congregation.
For her part, Sue has her own reasons for not believing in God and I'll give the writers props for making this a real issue and not a punchline. She worshiped her disabled sister and other kids made fun of her. Why would a God let something like that happen?
I don't have a problem with finding comfort in faith. In her darkest days, my mother found much comfort in God and the church and I respected her for that. What I have a problem with is how the show portrayed the only two non-believers as flawed, sad people who might eventually be swayed with the right miracle. To that I say, shame on you, Glee. And shame on you for that over the top "Papa, Can You Hear Me" number.
Does faith = God? God = faith? Are they two great tastes that taste great together? Personally, I believe you can enjoy your chocolate without your peanut butter and your faith without a God.
I need to ask, do we really need religion, or even the belief in God, to be sympathetic, well-rounded citizens of the earth? Can an agnostic, an atheist, a secular humanist, be seen as a person who can be trusted to find their own way and comfort without the presence of a higher power?
I've already asserted that I am not an atheist because I want to believe there is a God, though I have dabbled in Atheism in my younger days. I do not consider myself a Catholic, though I was baptized in that religion, or even a Christian, though I believe in and practice certain Christian principles. Do I need to be converted and will my children miss the benefit of a religious upbringing or even thanking His Almightyness for the mac and cheese at dinnertime? I don't have an answer for that and though I think some might have a strong opinion on this, we both know there are no hard and fast rules concerning faith.
The thing I think the producers and writers of Glee missed last night (emphasis on "I think", maybe I saw it differently than you did) is the presence of faith without the belief in God or religion. I believe in the beauty of nature, the soulfulness in my dog's eyes, the beauty in my daughters' laughter. Is that God's work? I'm not sure but it gets me through the day. I'm sure Kurt believes that music can move you and the right outfit can make your whole week. Sue believes in the power of discipline and... well I'm not sure what else Sue believes in but she loves her sister with a fierceness that displays a tiny bit of the good person hiding somewhere under that track suit.
The only points redeeming last night's show was the fact that Kurt did not "find" God when his father moved his fingers. He did not go to Jesus and neither did Sue, though she allowed her sister to pray for her. And that musical number with young Kurt? Tear. Jerker. But I don't feel like the point was driven home - Kurt didn't believe in something he couldn't see but he could reach out his hand and hold his father's. He believed in that. They missed the mark asserting that there are many people who don't need the presence of God or religion to be good people and whether some like it or not, their reasons and methods are sound.
There's no clean way to wrap this up. I have no desire to go into Thomas Henry Huxley's views or to debate whether God is dead or running for office in the Republic party. If going to Sunday mass grounds you and helps you be a better person, please continue. If a walk in the woods is enough to keep you from going postal on your neighbor and his barking dog, I'm all for it. If you feel the need to ram your idea of faith down my throat, don't let the door hit you where Buddah split you. Keep your dogma on a leash but let's talk about it like rational, thinking adults.
In the strangely coherent words of Puck, "It seems to me true spirituality or whatever you call it is about enjoying the life you've been given."
My name is Tania and I don't believe religion is for me right now and I'm not sure I believe in a single God, but I do believe I would enjoy a tasty grilled Cheesus right now.
My husband and I don't go to church. My children have only been in a church for Christmas service and the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit are not usually invited into our home. Jesus is a name we invoke only in fits of pique and other than the occasional blaspheme my children have little knowledge of the presence of Jesus Christ or God (dammit).
Mr. C was raised Congregationalist, went on retreats, sang in the choir, and participated in youth programs led by his parents who were youth leaders. I was raised Catholic, we were Saturday afternoon Catholics to be specific, and while I also spent many, many hours in the church, even attending a Catholic elementary school and singing in the chorus myself, I have my own reasons why I don't support or follow the teachings of the Catholic church any longer. Good reasons, I might add, but that's between me and God for the time being.
Yes, I believe in God or I try to anyway. To this day, I still want to believe in the existence of a higher power. But I struggle with His (or lower case, his) existence.
The fact that we haven't thrown our hat into the church-going ring, that we haven't adopted a local church of our own, that we haven't exposed our children to the teachings of the apostles and the New Testament, is a thorn in my Mother in Law's side and if my mother and grandmother were still alive, I have no doubt it would bother them too. Mr. C's mom is a spiritual woman who thinks that families are stronger for having a church to grow up in and around and my mother and Gram, God rest their sainted souls, held steadfast in their belief that the Catholic church, though hypocritical it may be, was the way to go.
I cannot, in good faith, hang my hat on either of those beliefs.
Last night I sat down to watch my favorite show, Glee, and Glee did something it rarely does - it disappointed me. I spent the entire hour watching the show horror movie-style: With my hands over my eyes, splayed fingers allowing only glimpses of the train wreck to get through, such was my fear that the writers of the show would "go there". They did. Well, almost.
Glee Tackles Religion is not something I thought I would ever see. Glee tackles Prince, yes. Glee tackles the musical stylings of Burt Bacharach, most definitely. Glee takes on the existence of God and the importance of allowing Him into your heart? *sigh*
The gist of the show was this: Finn gets hungry and makes himself a snack and upon inspecting the toasted cheese sandwich he cooked on the George Foreman, he sees the face of Jesus. The Grilled Cheesus. Praise gouda.
Finn decides that it's a sign and begins to pray to it for typical teen things - Please let him get his position as quarterback back, Please let him feel up his girlfriend. Spiritual things like that. Then Kurt's dad has a heart attack and ends up in a coma. This is when the host really hits the fan.
You see, almost everyone in the Glee club believes that God is good, God is great, God gives us chocolate cake. Not only that, but everyone needs a little God in their heart to get through life's trials. Everyone, that is, except Sue (more on her later) and Kurt who, bless his atheistic heart, believes in the Flying Spaghetti Monster and deems a morning at Mercedes' church is worthy only because he can wear a fabulous hat. "Very Christ chic," he says when appraising the congregation.
For her part, Sue has her own reasons for not believing in God and I'll give the writers props for making this a real issue and not a punchline. She worshiped her disabled sister and other kids made fun of her. Why would a God let something like that happen?
I don't have a problem with finding comfort in faith. In her darkest days, my mother found much comfort in God and the church and I respected her for that. What I have a problem with is how the show portrayed the only two non-believers as flawed, sad people who might eventually be swayed with the right miracle. To that I say, shame on you, Glee. And shame on you for that over the top "Papa, Can You Hear Me" number.
Does faith = God? God = faith? Are they two great tastes that taste great together? Personally, I believe you can enjoy your chocolate without your peanut butter and your faith without a God.
I need to ask, do we really need religion, or even the belief in God, to be sympathetic, well-rounded citizens of the earth? Can an agnostic, an atheist, a secular humanist, be seen as a person who can be trusted to find their own way and comfort without the presence of a higher power?
I've already asserted that I am not an atheist because I want to believe there is a God, though I have dabbled in Atheism in my younger days. I do not consider myself a Catholic, though I was baptized in that religion, or even a Christian, though I believe in and practice certain Christian principles. Do I need to be converted and will my children miss the benefit of a religious upbringing or even thanking His Almightyness for the mac and cheese at dinnertime? I don't have an answer for that and though I think some might have a strong opinion on this, we both know there are no hard and fast rules concerning faith.
The thing I think the producers and writers of Glee missed last night (emphasis on "I think", maybe I saw it differently than you did) is the presence of faith without the belief in God or religion. I believe in the beauty of nature, the soulfulness in my dog's eyes, the beauty in my daughters' laughter. Is that God's work? I'm not sure but it gets me through the day. I'm sure Kurt believes that music can move you and the right outfit can make your whole week. Sue believes in the power of discipline and... well I'm not sure what else Sue believes in but she loves her sister with a fierceness that displays a tiny bit of the good person hiding somewhere under that track suit.
The only points redeeming last night's show was the fact that Kurt did not "find" God when his father moved his fingers. He did not go to Jesus and neither did Sue, though she allowed her sister to pray for her. And that musical number with young Kurt? Tear. Jerker. But I don't feel like the point was driven home - Kurt didn't believe in something he couldn't see but he could reach out his hand and hold his father's. He believed in that. They missed the mark asserting that there are many people who don't need the presence of God or religion to be good people and whether some like it or not, their reasons and methods are sound.
There's no clean way to wrap this up. I have no desire to go into Thomas Henry Huxley's views or to debate whether God is dead or running for office in the Republic party. If going to Sunday mass grounds you and helps you be a better person, please continue. If a walk in the woods is enough to keep you from going postal on your neighbor and his barking dog, I'm all for it. If you feel the need to ram your idea of faith down my throat, don't let the door hit you where Buddah split you. Keep your dogma on a leash but let's talk about it like rational, thinking adults.
In the strangely coherent words of Puck, "It seems to me true spirituality or whatever you call it is about enjoying the life you've been given."
My name is Tania and I don't believe religion is for me right now and I'm not sure I believe in a single God, but I do believe I would enjoy a tasty grilled Cheesus right now.
What's in a name? Well it has nothing to do with a rose, I can tell you that.
I've been a parent long enough to know that no matter what I do, no matter what I say, I will always, inevitably, mess up something.
Little gaffes will go unnoticed by everyone but me. Slightly larger ones will be noticed by my husband or a close friend. Big parenting fuck ups will have tongues wagging long enough to make me want to hide in my room with the covers over my head until the next scandal. Thankfully, I haven't made one of those mistakes yet but let's face it, it's only a matter of time. This is me we're talking about.
Then there are those parenting failures that no one considers mistakes but I know they are and there's nothing anything you can do to make me think differently. So there.
Case in point, I named my child the wrong name.
Back before we had Caroline* (AKA - CC.) I asked for help in naming my child. That's right, I asked the internet, complete strangers in some cases, to help me name my baby. And you did help and it was awesome. I not only got help narrowing down my search for the perfect baby name but you also shared stories with me about naming your own children and in some cases the story behind your name. And then we all sang kumbaya and ate some s'mores.
The list had all the names my husband and I considered worthy of our blessed spawn and methodically I worked through that list and crossed off one name after another for one reason or another until we came to an agreement about which we liked best, to be revisited once we could look upon the baby and give her a name that suited her best. I call it an agreement, Mr. C calls it taking into account his wishes for one specific name and then summarily squashing that idea and choosing one I liked better. Potato - potahto.
Finally (seriously), the magical day came when I pushed an 8 pound baby from my lady parts who really, really did not want to come out. There was much rejoicing and crying... maybe more crying than rejoicing - pretty sure she was holding on by her fingernails in there - and when the nurse, or maybe the doctor (fingernails, sharp ones), asked what my perfect cherub of a daughter was to be called, I said, "Caroline."
And then I wanted to kick myself in the kidneys because it wasn't right.
But it seemed too late to correct it. Everyone was calling her Caroline. They were cooing her name, "Sweet, sweet Caroline". My husband was, probably intelligently, keeping his mouth shut about the whole thing. We told our then two year old that her sister's name was Caroline. She called her "Baby Sister Carowine". It was such a perfect moment it would have made a bystander want to smack someone in the head, so overwhelming was the adorableness.
For the next couple of days I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, angry, squalling infant. For the next few weeks I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, angry, refused to sleep more than 45 minutes at a time infant. For the next few months I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, OMG CHILD WILL YOU PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY SLEEP FOR ONCE???
What was I saying?
Then when she was around four months old it hit me - The Perfect Name.
I can't believe it hadn't occurred to me before. The Name was a perfect combination of my Nana's name and Mr. C's Nana's name. It was a name that could easily transition from childhood into adulthood and could even be shortened into a cute nickname. Not to put too fine a point on it but it really was The Perfect Name.
And no, I'm not sharing it. I have a hard enough time not referring to my kid in private by the name. But don't think I don't think about it. A lot.
Not only did I goof on her name but I gave her a name that there is always a chance will be either spelled or pronounced incorrectly. After living with mine for as long as I have, I swore I would never do that to my kids. Now people refer to her as Carolyn. Oops, my bad.
In the grand scheme of things this really isn't bad. Let's call it a Whoopsie. One day she'll ask if she was ever going to be called something else and before telling her I'll remind her of that time I picked her up from school 30 minutes late in mismatched shoes with my hair not brushed and insisted on slowing down in front of that cute boy from school while yelling, "Yoohoo! Want a ride, sailor?"
It should soften the blow.
Introducing Murgatroyd Sparkles Sarsaparilla. It's so obvious, I don't know why it took me so long to think of it.
*After five years of blogging I think it's time to use their real names. They're both somewhere on this blog anyway.
Little gaffes will go unnoticed by everyone but me. Slightly larger ones will be noticed by my husband or a close friend. Big parenting fuck ups will have tongues wagging long enough to make me want to hide in my room with the covers over my head until the next scandal. Thankfully, I haven't made one of those mistakes yet but let's face it, it's only a matter of time. This is me we're talking about.
Then there are those parenting failures that no one considers mistakes but I know they are and there's nothing anything you can do to make me think differently. So there.
Case in point, I named my child the wrong name.
Back before we had Caroline* (AKA - CC.) I asked for help in naming my child. That's right, I asked the internet, complete strangers in some cases, to help me name my baby. And you did help and it was awesome. I not only got help narrowing down my search for the perfect baby name but you also shared stories with me about naming your own children and in some cases the story behind your name. And then we all sang kumbaya and ate some s'mores.
The list had all the names my husband and I considered worthy of our blessed spawn and methodically I worked through that list and crossed off one name after another for one reason or another until we came to an agreement about which we liked best, to be revisited once we could look upon the baby and give her a name that suited her best. I call it an agreement, Mr. C calls it taking into account his wishes for one specific name and then summarily squashing that idea and choosing one I liked better. Potato - potahto.
Finally (seriously), the magical day came when I pushed an 8 pound baby from my lady parts who really, really did not want to come out. There was much rejoicing and crying... maybe more crying than rejoicing - pretty sure she was holding on by her fingernails in there - and when the nurse, or maybe the doctor (fingernails, sharp ones), asked what my perfect cherub of a daughter was to be called, I said, "Caroline."
And then I wanted to kick myself in the kidneys because it wasn't right.
But it seemed too late to correct it. Everyone was calling her Caroline. They were cooing her name, "Sweet, sweet Caroline". My husband was, probably intelligently, keeping his mouth shut about the whole thing. We told our then two year old that her sister's name was Caroline. She called her "Baby Sister Carowine". It was such a perfect moment it would have made a bystander want to smack someone in the head, so overwhelming was the adorableness.
For the next couple of days I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, angry, squalling infant. For the next few weeks I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, angry, refused to sleep more than 45 minutes at a time infant. For the next few months I tried out the name on my perfect, beautiful, OMG CHILD WILL YOU PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY SLEEP FOR ONCE???
What was I saying?
Then when she was around four months old it hit me - The Perfect Name.
I can't believe it hadn't occurred to me before. The Name was a perfect combination of my Nana's name and Mr. C's Nana's name. It was a name that could easily transition from childhood into adulthood and could even be shortened into a cute nickname. Not to put too fine a point on it but it really was The Perfect Name.
And no, I'm not sharing it. I have a hard enough time not referring to my kid in private by the name. But don't think I don't think about it. A lot.
Not only did I goof on her name but I gave her a name that there is always a chance will be either spelled or pronounced incorrectly. After living with mine for as long as I have, I swore I would never do that to my kids. Now people refer to her as Carolyn. Oops, my bad.
In the grand scheme of things this really isn't bad. Let's call it a Whoopsie. One day she'll ask if she was ever going to be called something else and before telling her I'll remind her of that time I picked her up from school 30 minutes late in mismatched shoes with my hair not brushed and insisted on slowing down in front of that cute boy from school while yelling, "Yoohoo! Want a ride, sailor?"
It should soften the blow.
Introducing Murgatroyd Sparkles Sarsaparilla. It's so obvious, I don't know why it took me so long to think of it.
*After five years of blogging I think it's time to use their real names. They're both somewhere on this blog anyway.
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